Do I? Should I?

 Salam.

This isn’t anger—it’s clarity. And I’ve stayed silent long enough, but you need to hear this.

You came into my life with promises—love, commitment, marriage. You called me a petunjuk, and I believed you, because I’d admired you for so long. But slowly, what began with those words became a quiet withdrawal. Our moments became brief, rushed—like my time and heart were only worth convenience.

What hurt most wasn’t just the silence. It was how you showed up for my body, but not for my emotions. That’s not love. That’s not kindness. And it’s not the man I thought you were.

I gave you honesty, effort, and belief. I received inconsistency, silence, and confusion. You said your door was always open—but you never built a space where I felt safe to stay.

I still wish you peace. I respect your intention to turn over a new leaf. But know this: real change is seen, not spoken. If you truly cared, you wouldn’t have treated me like something temporary. I chose you despite your past and your pain.

Now, I choose myself.

If one day you become the man who is ready to love with presence, clarity, and truth—not empty promises—I’ll hear you then. But until that day, I’m moving forward. Not with anger, but with strength.

Take care.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Salam. I've stayed silent, but you need to hear this.

What began with your promises of love, commitment, and marriage – promises I believed, knowing how long I'd admired you – became a slow withdrawal. Our moments together, rushed and brief, devalued my time and my heart.

It's not the silence that hurts most, but the contrast: your presence for my body, your absence for my emotions. That's not love or kindness. It's not the man I believed in.

I can't shrink myself for someone who ignores my pain. I offered you my openness and patience, and received only hope and confusion. Your open door led to a place where I never felt safe.

I still wish you peace. And I acknowledge your desire to turn over a new leaf. But understand: true care wouldn't have made me feel so temporary. I loved you despite your past, despite your pain. Now, I choose myself.

If you are serious about changing, and demonstrating that change through consistent actions, I would be open to re-evaluating things in the future. But moving forward, I need you to realize what you lost – not with regret, but with the understanding to become someone who no longer hurts sincere love.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I dont know which I should send or if i even should send it to him. considering he is being quite after i said my hello's after his week absence of text.

My heart still yearns for him, I dont know why