Hectic

Just me and my imaginary life

Meeting famous superstars and befriending them

And thats that

Because in reality if i ever meet them or befriend them it will never go any futher serious

Why?

Because marriage is consuming i guess

And a gamble

We gamble our life for marriage

When people make it like a fairy tale...

I do believe in love

I do believe in falling in love

But i dont think i'll know how to stay in love

........

These few days arent as stressful because the salary just came in

He did gave me nafkah but expects me to use my money first whenever i went out with her.

Usually i would be okay but this time i argue

Now his debit card is with me because he doesnt want to hold on to it

Yesterday when i brought the groceries he said"Owh okay we are left with 600+ after buying this and that", but then he told me he brought me a pair of pants and a toy for her. 

So i told him regarding the card, its pointless because if he still spends it online doesnt help much on my part.

..........

Its olympic week and he has been watching olympic almost all the time. I already told him to focus on her because she wants to play but he lept on going on he want his me time too. I am tired of arguing but ive said what ive said.

............

I am a bit calmer i guess but i just burst out crying just now. Maybe i thought or wished too hard on these things in my head that i wished that i would come true. I do want it to come true. I really do.

For her.

Always.

I hope Allah os willing to grant me.

If not i hope Allah woulf make me more grateful.

InsyAllah.

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